Edw@rd CuLLen-->

I've been asked by quite a few people, okay so what happened to Edward after this if Alice never saw him so happy again? What changed Edward so drastically that made him like we first see him in Twilight?

Honestly, I don't really know all the details and I'm not into writing a whole new fic about it >_< They had truly developed a bond as brother and sister. It shows in every way even AFTER Edward becomes so withdrawn the way he is in the book. You see it in the way that Alice and Edward work together to take care of Jasper. It shows the way that Alice comes back for Bella, and even in the way that they argue together in the car after their first encounter with James. There's just such an open and close connection between them.So after he left he really missed her, and the frustration that they had to leave her just boiled up inside him. Along with other ideas.

See, when Alice first saw Edward he was pretty much a fresh vampire as far as experiences with others go. It had already been two years since he'd been changed and he hadn't gone out too much before this. Coming into contact with Jasper, a vampire who was so tortured with himself and his life...someone who was looking for more, was a new experience for him and opened his mind so many other possibilities and questions that he had never thought of asking himself before. What was he meant to be? Why couldn't he drink human blood? What was out there that he didn't know about? Why was he here? Was there still a God for someone like him? Could he be saved? If his existance were ended, would he be able to go to Heaven like humans could? (lol yea the religion question really bugged him the most >_<) Being with Alice distracted and delayed him from seeking these answers out because he cherished and loved his new connection with her. When forced to leave her the questions burned stronger in the back of his mind until finally, he couldn't take it anymore. He turned to Carlisle for answers but what Carlisle told him didn't satisfy him and the two got into an argument. Edward had begun to feel that Carlisle was protecting him, and after seeing how tortured Jasper was he knew that things couldn't possibly be the way that Carlisle had said they were. In the end, Edward left Carlisle to explore the world for himself by himself.

For some time Edward looked for others of his kind. He saw vampires waste away before him, ashamed of who they were. Some some who weren't so ashamed of who they were and relished in the screams and agony of their victims, like Elliot did. He watched all of this from afar until one day he couldn't help himself any more and decided to take action.

Edward tried to save the victim of a masochistic vampire and was immediately shunned by the victim. It was just as Bella had said. He had been called a monster and everything else you can think of. It made him confused, scared, doubtful, and even angry. Was he really a monster? Could monsters be happy? Do monsters get to go to Heaven? Does God care for or love monsters like He does humans? The answer that he got from a homeless bitter old man who was dying in an alley one day gave him the answers he had expected.

There was no salvation for any monster. No God for anyone but humans. Monsters are only
meant to exist. And if God can't love a monster, then no one can...A monster can only love another monster and nothing else.

There's probably nothing worse in the world than to find out you're monster forever, even after death. That there was only existing and anything beyond that would be to join the ranks of the vampires who liked to slaughter the innocent. There was nothing more...nothing less.

In the end he decided that the best chance he could have at a decent existence was one with Carlisle. With this in mind, resigned to his fate, he started to make his way back to Jackson. (note: by this time Jasper and Alice had already left to be alone with themselves)